The Beginning to the Start of the Rest of Life

In order to understand my world view and why I say the things I say, you need to first hear my story. Why I chose the paths I went down, and why I closed doors on opportunities, are integral to understanding the life lessons I will share with you. Here is part one of my story, told from the eyes of 24-year-old KCB in 2016…

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I want to be creative. I want to use the right side of my brain to write, inspire and encourage others. I want to wear a pencil skirt, blouse, and blazer with pumps. I want to carry my cute laptop bag containing a mac, iPad, and folders of creative content. I want sit at my desk, a journal, and one of those over-the-top everything planners perched on it, with a view of the city. I want to go to dinners to network, and coffee shops to build professional relationships. I want to volunteer to be on a fundraising board for a nonprofit to plan events and create awareness…

*Ding-dong*

The sound of a call light rings me back to reality. I am a patient care assistant on the general surgical unit, and have to stop searching Indeed.com for those type of jobs I so craved, to help my patient go to the bathroom. So glamorous, right? I’m three years out of college wondering if this is all there is to life.

No, I did not go to college to assist people to the bathroom. I have a bachelor’s degree in Public Relations from Indiana Wesleyan University. What happened? How’d I end up here, dreaming of a much more glamorous life than the one I currently led? Well, I’ll tell you…

First off, I’ll start by telling you I did not initially go to college for a PR degree. I started off going for my nursing degree. My incapability to say no to friends hanging out and my crippling depression kept me from obtaining the GPA I needed to enter the program. I kept trying. I retook classes, I sought mentors, tutors, and motivators, but it wasn’t enough. I was halfway through my first semester of junior year when I needed to change my major. Completely lost and confused I went to a life coach and friends for help. I did the research and discovered public relations was the only major where I could still graduate on time, which meant taking all major classes during my last three semesters. Longs days, several overnights and so much information crammed into my head that I barely remembered what classes I was taking, ensued.

Then came time to graduate and figure out what I wanted to do. I applied to several upon several jobs, not even knowing what I wanted to do. I then came upon the Disney College Program. I applied on the last day they were accepting applications, did a web and phone interview, and was accepted to the Fall Advantage program of 2014. The ups and downs, firsts and lasts I was about to experience are stories for another time.

During the last year of my college career I began to fall in love with the job of a PR specialist. While in the Disney College Program, I dreamed of one day being on the corporate side of the entertainment mogul. After several conversations with those who had my dream job, I realized there were two ways of getting said job. One way was to work for the company for around ten years, while doing side jobs and internships to gain experience, while networking and maintaining relationships with people inside the company. The other way was to leave the company, work hard in the public relations field, and in about five years come back and apply, while networking and maintaining relationships with people inside the company. Remember, It’s not necessarily what you know, but who you know, that matters most.

I chose option number two. I began to apply for jobs in the Orlando area, and came across a job I thought would be a good fit. It was one of those jobs that sell things inside of a Sam’s Club or Costco and you would work your way up to owning your own business… yada, yada. They were really good at selling the job. I bought it and began working. I started to immediately hate it. Convincing people to spend money on these products I didn’t believe in wasn’t my idea of a good job. My boss knew I wasn’t enjoying it, and we came to the conclusion it would be best for me to leave.

I immediately applied to Universal Studios Orlando, and accepted a job at the High in the Sky Seuss Trolley Train Ride at Seuss Landing in Islands of Adventure (say that five times fast). I loved working there and made fast friends with other team members. I began to dream of a job on the corporate side of Universal. Unfortunately, I was hurting financially and began to lose hope in my dream. With the loss of motivation, my homesickness began to sink in and I moved back in with my parents to Kalamazoo, MI.

After a year of building up my finances, I moved out of my parent’s house with my younger sister to a two bedroom, two bath townhouse, which brings me to a job I could’ve done right out of high school, and nothing to show for all of my accomplishments in life. “Was this all to life”, and “Is this all I am meant for”, are common questions I asked myself more and more each day. I began to feel lost and depression seeped back into my life (but then again, did it ever really go away? Another story for another time).

I needed something new. A new goal, a new challenge. Maybe I’m meant to go back to Orlando? So I began to search for jobs I could do remotely or move back to. I reached out to Central Florida’s PRSSA president eager for advice. About a month after conversing back and forth, and having her review my cover letter and resume, she reached out to me about a writing job I could do remotely. I was so excited! I only worked three twelve hour shifts a week, so I figured I had plenty of time to work on writing assignments.

The PR expert who was starting his own firm, hired me and assigned me my first writing piece; Why are radio spots helpful for business growth? I’ve got this. I have a degree in PR and I’m an expert in Googling. This is my chance to break free. This is an amazing opportunity to learn and grow in the field. Little did I know, my depression and years of feeling unsure about who I am, what my purpose is, and what my talents are, would creatively block me from succeeding. What I turned in was a half-produced blog that he used as an outline to write his own version. That ended that grand opportunity I had and I was back to square one.

While working at the hospital, serval patients, coworkers, and managers encouraged me to pursue nursing, again. I was great at helping others and lifting spirits, so why not? I enrolled in Grand Valley State University and began taking pre-nursing classes (I needed specific classes for GVSU to be able to apply to the program).

I started to feel a little better, but after my first semester of working full time and going to classes the days I didn’t work, I was burnt out. I was drawn to the dream I once had. Now, I’m back to looking at jobs on Indeed in between taking patients to the bathroom.

I assist my patient back to bed and tuck her in. I look around, tidy up her room, and check to see she has fresh water next to her bed. I ask if there is anything else I can do for her, as she replies with a no, thank you, I head back to the nurses station to chart.

All my patients are sleeping, so let’s check indeed one more time. I come across a job as a Public Affairs Specialist for the National Guard. Hmmm… I do more research and I am intrigued. Is this a sign? It’s perfect. I’ll go to bootcamp, go to a training school for public affairs, and come back to work. I was three years out of college with no recent experience, and this would give me the experience I need to obtain a job in my desired field. I’ll head to a recruiter’s office when I get out of work!

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Little did I know, that was the first step toward turning my world upside down. This started the avalanche of events that would make me question my beliefs, challenge who I thought I was, and confuse the idea of who I wanted to be. Stay tuned next week for Part Two, and how I ended up on the enlisted side of the Navy!

XOXO,

KCB